Gender bias in the workplace remains a persistent challenge, with women often facing stereotypes and misconceptions that hinder their professional progress. Mita Mallick, storyteller, business leader and passionate advocate for diversity, equity, and inclusion (DEI), joined Negotiate Anything to bring to light the gender bias women encounter, particularly concerning their appearance and personal finances. Using her experience and expert insights, Mita outlines how this bias can create a barrier to effective salary negotiations, as well as advice for navigating this difficult conversation.
The Quiet Myth of Gender Bias
In her new book, Reimagine Inclusion: Debunking 13 Myths to Transform Your Workplace, Mita highlights 13 workforce myths that she believes are holding professionals back from meaningful progress.
Myth 6 is one that made her feel particularly courageous, as it stemmed from a very uncomfortable conversation she had with an employer. To her surprise, she received an incredible response from her followers.
It’s the myth that if you are comfortable in your personal finances, or demonstrate luxury in your appearance, you shouldn’t be asking for a raise because “you don’t need more money.”
In Mita’s case, she approached her boss to inquire about a raise, and he told her that given her husband’s salary (he worked at the same company), she shouldn’t be worried about a raise because she didn’t need it.
Understanding Gaslighting & Cultural Beliefs
This experience stunned Mita into silence, a common reaction for women put in her position.
Before diving into recommended responses, it’s important to understand exactly what is happening in this moment. According to Mita, this is a classic example of gaslighting in the workplace.
Gaslighting, as Mita describes, is a form of psychological abuse where individuals are dismissed or minimized, leading them to question their sense of reality. In this context, and those like it, women are made to feel like they are selfish or unreasonable for asking for a raise, even when it has been rightfully earned.
This gaslighting tactic aims to undermine confidence and deter women from advocating for themselves. Mita emphasizes that recognizing these tactics is the first step in overcoming them. By understanding the manipulation at play, women can maintain their self-assuredness and navigate negotiations with clarity.
The Appearance Dilemma
Mita highlights another facet of gender bias that many women face in the workplace: appearance. The way women dress and present themselves can influence how they are perceived and compensated.
The struggle lies in the fact that many women, particularly women of color, will be unfairly criticized no matter where they land on the spectrum. Mita reflects on the fact that if she wore a hoodie and jeans to work, she wouldn’t be taken seriously as a professional, but when drives up in a luxury car or wears designer clothing, it becomes used against her in salary negotiations.
The Impact of Gender Bias on Salary Negotiations
Mita’s personal experience resonates with many women who face gender bias during salary negotiations. Such biases have real consequences, leading to underpayment and undervaluation of women’s contributions. Mita’s story underscores the urgent need to challenge these biases and equip women with strategies to assert their worth in the workplace.
Finding Alternative Paths to Success
Navigating gender bias often requires creative strategies. It also means accepting the realities of privilege and structural bias in the workplace. This means striking the balance between delivering a productive response and maintaining a positive rapport with key-decision makers in the company.
Mita encourages individuals to consider allies and advocates within their organizations. If a direct supervisor is unsupportive, seeking assistance from a colleague who holds influence can be a game-changer.
In this scenario, when talking to a trusted male colleague in the break room, Mita simply asked him how he goes about getting a raise. Her colleague was interested in her curiosity, which led Mita to explain her current dilemma. From there, he took the lead in advocating on her behalf.
Mita’s advice suggests embracing “quiet luxury” – outfits that exude confidence without excessive labels. However, she acknowledges that the path forward is complex, and finding a balance between authenticity and professionalism is an ongoing journey.
Gender bias, particularly when it comes to salary negotiations and appearance, remains a significant challenge in the workplace. Mita Mallick’s experiences and insights shed light on this issue, offering guidance for women seeking to navigate these biases successfully. By recognizing gaslighting tactics, seeking alternative paths to success, and embracing authenticity, women can overcome these hurdles and assert their worth in the corporate world.
Follow Mita Mallick on LinkedIn. To listen to the full episode, click here.
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